And that’s a new… world… RECORD

Check it out! A Jamaican dude named Usain Bolt who was slated to run the 400 in the Olympics just set a world record time in the 100 at 9.72 seconds – beating the old record by .02 and making him the new “world’s fastest man”. Fellow Jamaican Asafa Powell, the old world record holder, first set the record in 2005 with a 9.77 run, and later beat it with a 9.74. Apparently Bolt was using the 100 race for “speed work” and I guess he has a hidden talent at it. The dude is 6′4″ too – Now, I used to run track, and it’s not everyday you see a guy that tall line up. In fact, usually you would laugh at him as you burned him out of the blocks because he’d have a tough time accelerating. I gotta say though, the name “Bolt” just belongs with a fast time – like… “he bolted to the lead, making the other runners appear as if their shoes were bolted to the track”. Yeah corny, but you know the media will eat that one up. Well congrats to Bolt, and good luck with those steroids accusations… just kidding, hopefully.

Simmons!

Very Quick thoughts on this:

Regardless, it’s [Los Angeles crowd] a lively, knowledgable crowd that loves Kobe more than any other NBA city loves its signature player. I can say that with complete confidence. They love him. For years and years, they stood by him, defended him, made excuses for him and kept cheering him, and now he’s nearly finished vindicating the entire rollercoaster ride of an experience for them.

Except when they BOOED HIM EARLIER THIS YEAR. Simmons is usually knowledgeable about the NBA. Where is his brain here? Kobe’s vindicated the ones that stood by him, sure. But many booed him earlier!

And honestly, it’s one of the biggest reasons why I love basketball so much. Of all the team sports, it’s the only one in which a single player can impose his will on a game, a series or even in some cases, an entire season.

A great runningback/quarterback? 1999-2000 Pedro? Gretzky? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???

That is all.

First Time

Everyone remembers the first time, whether it’s 2002 Pats-Rams, 2004 sox-cardinals, or sixth-grade behind the swingset (just kidding).

This is gonna be awesome. Im not sure if Im gonna be able to go to game 2 like I wanted, but either way,this is awesome. And I don’t care that Im basically talking to myself right now.

Here are a few highlights to reminisce about before this series starts. (And yeah this first one probably should’ve been a Laker win, but I will take it!

Those, I believe, were both back in 2001-2002, when the Celtics could’ve met the Lakers in the Finals if the celts had beaten the Nets. Of course, while the Celtics won both in the regular season (again, I think these were the same season), they probably would’ve been swept.

Here’s a classic…

And fine, one for Laker fans…

Yao Ming “Spotted” in Charlotte

By “spotted”… I mean he stuck out like a sore thumb. Apparently Yao took advantage of his time off from the Houston Rockets with a trip to Charlotte for last Sunday’s Coca-Cola 600. He and some drivers played a game of “Around the World” in victory lane which I imagine was a disaster for the drivers. I hear that they tried to fit him in a car, but anybody who’s ever seen one of these cars realizes that had a snowball’s chance in hell of working. Maybe if they had outfitted the car with Michael Waltrip’s roof hatch from 2003 they could’ve dropped him in there. He would definitely have had incredible visibility with his whole head above the roof – however, no word from NASCAR on exactly how safe this would have been.

Whipped

Kobe Bryant: whapshhhhhh (or wapaaaaa friends reference!!)

Eventually he’d even share a kiss with his wife Vanessa – gossip sites be damned – and walk off hand in hand, the two of them headed to the movies to see “Sex and the City.”

Kobe and a chick flick – and he wasn’t even afraid to admit it.

“Seriously,” he said. “We’re going to see it.”

Is it possible for an adulterer to be whipped? When Sex and the City is involved I say yes.

WNBA INTERVIEW!!! (not really)

In my billion (2) attempts to get a WNBA interview I always ask about a dunk contest. Here’s a recent email I sent to the WNBA.

Hi guys! I was wondering, with that new commercial you have with the girl dunking, any chance of some sort of WNBA dunk contest this year or in the coming years? I think the WNBA definitely has the personnel to pull it off with Candace Parker, Lisa Leslie, and Sylvia Fowles all having dunked in previous games. Any chance something like this happens?

Thanks!

I actually think this would be cool. Let’s see if they write back… I hope they love my bubbly personality. Also, should I have started with “hi guys”? They know that “guys” can be a synecdoche referring to all of mankind right? Uh… I mean humankind. Whatever.

I was wrong V2

I’m sorry Kendrick. I was wrong. Maybe you’re not my Jason Campbell. When you have the best night by a Celtics center in like 3 years (Mark Blount had some sick games) you’re excluded from the Jason Campbell category. Who is it then? I know it’s definitely not a point guard that used to wear #12 for the Friars. Maybe it’s Tony Allen. I like Tony Allen a lot. I’ll figure it out soon enough.

How Could They Not get Kobe For This?!

How could Kobe not be the voice of this?  Kinda cool anyway, but seriously, this is what Kobe was born to do, not basketball.

That time of year again.

Ohhh yeah. summer sports are what it’s all about. Baseball’s in full swing and the basketball playoffs are nearing their conclusion. But what sport is the lead story on espn.com concerned with? The annual Scripps national spelling bee.

(Begin Editorial): Now I’ve got major, major respect for all of the kids in the spelling bee. All of them are ridiculously smart and talented, and I’m sure they’ve dedicated an absolutely huge number of hours in preparing for the competition. That’s awesome for them and they have every right to be proud of their accomplishments. In fact, I think someone who did very well at the competition attends a certain institution in Durham…interesting. I always think it’s interesting though that ESPN, the worldwide leader, covers the spelling bee. There’s many other things it could be showing…like tonight’s WNBA game featuring the Los Angeles Sparks against the Indiana Fever!!! YEAAAAH! CANDACE PARKER TAG!

Also…here’s more proof of the awesomness of bill simmons:

Great Sports Anyway you spell it (his liveblog of the 2002 spelling bee – seriously, how awesome is that. i’m sure he got paid some pretty big bucks to liveblog a spelling bee. awesome).

ESPN also did a feature on Samir Patel, a former national spelling bee title contender. Here’s his info:

When he was 9, Samir Patel became a Scripps National Spelling Bee legend by finishing third. Now 14, after five tries and, shockingly, no title, Patel is too old to compete.

Here’s the article: Spelling bee icon Samir Patel moves on to next challenges

(I’ll be completely honest. I cherry-picked these quotes from the article.)

It is unfair — and uneducated, really — that critics dubbed Samir the “Dan Marino of spelling” last summer when he muffed the word “clevis” and finished his fifth and final Scripps National Spelling Bee without a title. Anyone who has stood on that stage, under the hot lights and cameras, knows the bee can be cruelly random.

Solid writing…but really? The Dan Marino of spelling? You mean Samir Patel is of “Italian and Polish” descent? Had some awesome clutch performances for the Pittsburgh Panthers football team? Was an amazing NFL quarterback who started as a rookie qb in the pro bowl?? And, most importantly, the man who shot Boomer Esion (sp?) one of the coldest looks I have ever seen? Wait till the end of the video.

Mothers cooed when his helium voice confidently belted out Y-A-M-A-M-A-I, which, by the way, is a Japanese silkworm. Teenage girls mobbed him, asking for autographs. Samir just innocently giggled and oozed boyish cuteness.

“Is it just my luck, or am I getting all the French words?” he cracked after one brain buster.

No funny commentary needed. But is Elizabeth Merril serious? Do teenage girls really mob pre-adolescent spelling bee title contenders? I should have readjusted some priorities in the early days then…

“I don’t really think girls would go for my looks,” he says. “I’m not the most handsome person ever. My mom thinks I’m too young. Apparently, I’m not allowed to get married ’til I’m 30.”

Brown Power!

He didn’t know of his spelling bee history, either, until he was flipping the channels at home and saw him do a celebrity appearance on the Food Network.

Now that’s pretty baller.

Regardless…major props to all of the spelling bee kids.

Um, so yeah…

… the officiating was weak in game 4 between the Spurs and the Lakers. I’m going to try to be completely un-bias, which I think is possible because I dislike both teams. I think I hate the Spurs more, but I can never root for the Lakers, unless Odom is directly involved. Complicated, and no one cares.

Anyway, on to the officiating in tonights game. AWFUL. Let me explain.

Luke Walton gets NO respect. First he got called for a travel on a play where they easily could’ve called a foul on the spurs. Then a few plays later he dribbles near flopoholic Robert Horry who “draws” a charge by jumping backwards. It was definitely a block or a no call. I would like to point out that the travel by Walton was much less egregious than the three running steps by Duncan that preceded a dunk in the second quarter. Laker fans should’ve been pretty angry at this point in the game.

…But Laker fans have no right to be angry anymore. The refs made up for these few bad calls with a SEASON KILLING bad call on the last play of the game. Yup, it was a foul. You can’t just not call fouls in the last minute of the game. Fisher rammed into Brent Barry with one second left in the game and the score 93-91. Barry understandably forced up a wild three and the game ended 93-91. They call that foul and you have career 82% freethrow shooting Brent Barry at the line with a chance to tie the game.

They interviewed Kobe Bryant after the game. “No foul,” was all he would say. What else is he gonna say? It’s obviously a foul and Joey “call a tech on duncan for laughing” Crawford killed the Spurs again. I guess in a way it’s the ultimate revenge for Crawford, who, I believe, previously got fined because of his poor treatment of the Spurs.

This call was really bad, and I had money riding on the Lakers. Sure it was 11 cents, but it’s still money. if a guy who bets on the Lakers can say that was a bad call, then everyone can admit that was a bad call. Right Socal? (In no way do I think Socal will say it was a bad call.)

So basically, the refs were bad throughout, culminating in a bad call that will be talked about in San Antonio for awhile. Did the refs make up for bad calls against the lakers with that last bad call? Perhaps, but that last no call robbed us of one of the more exciting finishes in sports, a guy at the line shooting two, down two.

On a side note, with about a minute left Odom hit two clutch free throws and then the rest of the Lakers team proceeded to try as hard as they could to give away the game (kobe included). It was very reminicent of this (here for full version). Why would Kobe shoot that shot? Just a strange game.