Mmm… Chicken

May 6, 2008

Mmm...chickenIn the week following the unfortunate euthanization of Kentucky Derby 2nd place finisher Eight Belles, PETA has appeared on the scene to spew claims about the sport of horse racing. (Site 1, Site 2) To start, here is how they describe the horses:

They weigh at least 1,000 pounds, they have legs that are supported by ankles the size of a human’s, and they’re forced to run around dirt tracks at speeds of more than 30 miles per hour while carrying people on their backs.(1) Racehorses are the victims of a multibillion-dollar industry that is rife with drug abuse, injuries, and race fixing, and many horses’ careers end in slaughterhouses. A New York Daily News reporter remarked, “The thoroughbred race horse is a genetic mistake. It runs too fast, its frame is too large, and its legs are far too small. As long as mankind demands that it run at high speeds under stressful conditions, horses will die at racetracks.”(2)

Wow. First, I wouldn’t call the horses “victims”… but maybe the vehicle that supports the industry. When they say carrying “people” on their backs, they mean a jockey… who weights something like 1/4 an average American. Drug abuse? I guess the results of Eight Belles drug test will help confirm or deny that claim. Race fixing? Who knows, but I have no idea how this would hurt the horses. Genetic mistake? I guess my ankles are a genetic mistake too because if I step in a hole, they’re toast.

Racehorses can cost millions of dollars and are often purchased by syndicates, which may be composed of thousands of members.(3,4) There are also trainers, handlers, veterinarians, and jockeys involved, so a horse is rarely able to develop any kind of bond with one person or with other horses. Racehorses travel from country to country, state to state, and racetrack to racetrack, so few horses are able to call one place “home.” Most do not end up in the well-publicized races but are instead trucked, shipped, or flown to the thousands of other races that take place all over the country every year.Sad blob

I’m sorry that the horses have no friends… maybe they should take Zoloft to combat their depression? I’m not going to be one of those people who say that animals have no feelings… but seriously. If we’re gonna compare animals to humans, I guess my person experience applies. I’ve traveled between several countries, moved states, and gone to many racetracks (NASCAR, close enough), but I’m doing good. Also, why is it bad that some horses go to less-publicized races? It’s not like they’re celebrities desperate for attention… and there is no red carpet leading into Churchill Downs.

Eight Belles’ death is yet another reminder that these horses are raced when they are so young that their bones have not properly formed, and they are often raced on surfaces that are too hard for their bones—like the hard track at Churchill Downs. Eight Belles’ jockey whipped her mercilessly as she came down the final stretch. This is no great surprise, since trainers, owners, and jockeys are all driven by the desire to make money, leaving the horses to suffer terribly.

When the horses are three years old, they are in their prime and as strong and fast as they ever will be – that’s why all horses raced in the Triple Crown are that age. I don’t know how racing a bunch of old geezer horses would be good for their bones either. Trained horses have been whipped forever to make them do what humans want – did you know that… people ride horses? and the car wasn’t the first discovery after the wheel? Clearly, the first attempt at using the wheel was to get Bud Light to the party. By the way, desiring to make money is called being American… don’t make me pull the communist card.

PETA is calling on the racing industry to suspend the jockey and trainer, to bar the owner from racing at the track, and, at the very least, to stop using young horses who are so susceptible to these types of horrific injuries.Shaq is an amazing jockey

AT THE VERY LEAST? To stop using the horses means to stop horse racing… which is THE MOST you can do. Using old horses would mean using slower horses, and racing means bringing your fastest vehicle to the competition. Suspending the poor jockey who PETA is turning into a scapegoat is ridiculous – he had nothing to do with what happened to the horse. I mean, as you can see in the image there have been far less responsible jockeys.

We’re also demanding that the industry stop racing horses on hard tracks and switch to softer, synthetic surfaces, which would spare horses’ bones and joints, in addition to calling for a permanent ban on the use of whips.

Do you want to race horses on human-style rubber tracks with 20 lanes so they can’t come close to interfering with each other? If softer tracks will help, I’m all for it – but despite what PETA says, these racetracks in general have very little money to throw around and any expensive alternatives are not gonna happen. Banning whips? Do you know that whips are still used on humans in places around the world? Also, couldn’t the jockey be in danger if he has no control over the horse he is riding?

Although Eight Belles’ death, like Barbaro’s before hers, made headlines, countless lesser-known horses suffer similar fates—their broken legs and battered bodies are simply hidden from public view. Most racehorses end up broken down or cast off or are sent to Europe for slaughter.

Yes because those damn Europeans will viciously kill our horses for us… right. I know there are countless injuries in horse racing, as there are in every sport. Also, 2 in every 1000 horses dying in races is a very high percentage. But the vast majority of owners, jockeys, and fans are involved in horse racing because they love the animals, and turning them into the bad guys is insane.

In conclusion: Keep eating meat. Kidding, but maybe PETA should go back to hounding us meat-eaters and forget nosing around in such an established and respected sport. In the least, they should come back with better reasoning and demands to change the sport for the better.


Should I do a Live Blog? (Answer: No)

May 6, 2008

I may cut this very short, Or just delete this because we seem to do lots of live blogs around here. And Im typing this at 8:03 eastern (is there really any other time zone?) and the game starts in like 5 mins. Can I really go all 4 quarters? If the Celts are getting killed will I stop immediately? Will Charles Barkley ever be able to pronounce Zydrunas Ilgauskas? These questions answered and more, comin up.

8:11- apparently Tyler Perry’s house of Paine is the number 1 sitcom of all time. Never heard of it.

8:14- so when is this game gonna start?

8:15- It’s love, it’s love, it’s love, it’s la-la-lalala it’s love, it’s love, it’s love, it’s la-la-lalala it’s love (I guess I am gonna do that Bill Simmons thing where most of my comments aren’t about the game, hopefully this changes when the game starts)

8:16- Is it kinda weird to anyone that the Pistons are already up 2-0 in their series and the Celtics series hasn’t even started yet?

8:17- Yes, Mike Fratello, Lebron James is really, really good. No, Mike Fratello, Lebron did not deserve more MVP consideration. Watch any Western Conference games this year Mike?

8:19- And the tip!

8:19- So let me get this straight, if the Celtics lose, theyll say they were too tired from their other series. If the Cavs lose, theyll say they weren’t used to the long layoff.

8:20- Lebron James sucks. He’s 0-1. He’s on pace to make 0 shots today.

8:21- K Perk tries to go one-on-one by himself on a fast break. Cmon KPerk, we know that you cant dribble.

8:22- Woooow NO ONE can make a shot. its 2-0 cavs

8:23 Zydrunas grew up as a point guard?! He’d be better than Damon Jones was.

8:24- Lebron James gets lots of calls. Just wanted to make sure we all realized this.

8:26- Garnett finally scores the first celtics basket. Both teams are sucking. 5-2 cavs

8:28- These “bandwagon” fans sure are cheering loudly. It’s 6-5 celts

8:29- Rondo FOR MVP. 8 early points.

8:30- this live blog is already pretty long and we’re only a few minutes into the game. My goal is to make it so long not one person will actually read the whole thing. (Ive probably already accomplished this goal)

8:35- They called traveling? ON LEBRON??!?! Wow. Mark down this date. Lebron doesn’t even try to avoid travels anymore. He changed pivot feet and then took another step and you could see he was shocked when they called it.

8:40- It’s hard to make fun of things when your actually enjoying the game. Don’t worry Im sure Sam cassell will enter the game soon.

8:42- First free throws for Celtics come with roughly one minute left in the half. Sound fair to everyone? ok. Its 22-15 celts

8:45- Posey hits a three to end the quarter 25-15. I guess the celtics aren’t tired. And the Cavs suck because they had five days off.

8:47- Tyler Perry’s House of Paine might be the best comedy ever, but there is no way the Bill Engvall show is “very funny”

8:48- Inter quarter interviews, sooooooo weeeeeeird

8:51- Sam Cassell enters! (and hits a shot??! wow nice sam. You still suck. Stop shooting)

8:52- Delonte West is so ghetto but for some reason I totally feel like I could take him in a fight. And I dont even think i could beat Socalsports in a fight.

8:55- best line from those Dwade-Barkley commercials: “They gonna get to me. It takes time. I’m still alive”

8:59- three straight turnovers for the Celtics. Or as Mike Fratello calls it “three straight times of not getting a legitamate shot”.  Right. No shots=no legitimate shots

9:00- Both teams are really sucking on offense. 29-22

9:07- Lebron fakes an injury after not even being fouled. And then they call a flagrant. Great. This is normal. (Ok, so it was a foul. But no way a flagrant. And it was only a foul because sam cassell followed through on his clean block of Lebron)

9:08- Wow the Celtic fans are surprisingly understandable with their “bullshit” chant. I dont think Ive ever heard a better one. I take pride in this.

9:10- I think both teams have like 50 turnovers. Cleveland is shooting like 20 percent. But they have tons of freethrows. 32-30. This game is almost as boring as this post. And thats reaallly boring.

9:14- Good news! THis live blog is way better than yahoo sports’ BDL live blog of the same game. Actually no, this is bad news. Bad news for all people everywhere who can read and have internet access.

9:17- Lebron cant shoot today so he just dives into people and shoots freethrows. He has ten points and one field goal.

9:20- Boston SUCKS tonight, but is up 3. Cleveland SSUUCCKKSS tonight and is only down 3. So good news for everyone, right?

9:23- Fratello, get over the fact that Lebron didnt come close to winning the MVP. He didnt deserve it. Calm down buddy.

9:25- Aight Im cutting this short at halftime. It’s 41-37. If you made it this far, I don’t believe you.

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Final thoughts:

Celts win 76-72, that was probably the worst game Ive ever seen. And I saw the Celtics win a 66-64 game.

Sam Cassell might not be as bad as I thought, but I still don’t want him to shoot.

Both of these teams would lose by 30 points to the hornets right now


How ’bout You Trade For Matt Cassel and End This

May 6, 2008

Apparently there is a quarterback controversy in Arizona. This poses an important philosophical point. Can there be a quarterback controversy if both quarterbacks suck, and nobody cares about your team? Meh, I guess so. My suggestion, put in Leinart and teach all of your wide receivers how to strip the football out of a running cornerbacks’ hands. Then perhaps those high arching ten yard passes might actually gain yards for the Cardinals.

But its certainly a comfortable feeling that a former MVP of the league can’t beat out this guy (pictured) for the starting job. Start gearing up for the 2009 NFL draft Cardinal fans!!