Karma

What was Eric Mangini thinking?!? They’re down 3 on the Skins 5-yard-line with 5 seconds left, and he takes a timeout to kick a field goal? Uhh, this is preseason. If this game went into OT that would be pathetic – just roll out the gurney cause somebody’s getting hurt. I don’t care if the Jets scored on that last play and we lost, please just don’t let it go to OT.

But oh, Nugent’s easy kick from 23 yards bounced off the upright. Yeah, that’s what you get. Thank you football gods for not letting us play OT. The last thing the Redskins need is another chance to get hurt.

Let’s talk about Chad

Chad Johnson, always a character, couldn’t bear Michael Phelps stealing the headlines of the sports world so he popped up today to say that he and his Liberty City boys could beat Phelps. This article explains it pretty well – I especially liked this: “Cinco survived for several minutes on the bottom of the pool as it has been determined that Johnson needs less than half the amount of oxygen for his brain to function versus the average human being.” Burnnnn. However, he did make a valid point that inner-city kids don’t have the same opportunities in regards to this sort of thing, although, knowing him, I think it may have been by accident. Good ‘ol Chad.

Chad Ocho Cinco

Also, I know Chad likes being called Ocho Cinco, but I didn’t know he liked it this much. It doesn’t seem real, but they say “seriously” in the article so I’ll trust them. His name would legally become Chad Ocho Cinco, and it sounds like he could make a bunch of cash off jersey sales. I have to admit, not a bad idea if you’re crazy enough to do it. It says, “Johnson has made veiled references about future plans that he has said will change the way fans think about him,” and I guess taking a page out of Pacma… err Adam Jones’ book is a great way to start.

Oh yeah…it’s fantasy football time.

So there’s a buncha things going on right now in the sporting world.The Olympics are going on, baseball’s pennant races are heating up, and the NFL is gearing up for a new season. Gotta love watching random Olympic events that I would never otherwise pay attention to/know anything about. Although..you can’t go wrong with women’s beach volleyball.

But it’s really time for fantasy football. Last year was my 1st year playing and uhhh, I can’t believe I waited that long to start. It really is one of the greatest things ever. It’s awesome to play with friends and helps you meet new people (like that one kid who kept out screaming “F@^#” whenever someone drafted his “sleeper pick”). It’s great – it turns meaningless week 16 games involving the bills, the texans, the raiders, (etc.) into huuuuuuuuuuuuuuge games for your playoffs. It leads to constantly updating 7 different stat trackers and trying to calculate scores if you’re too cheap to buy the automatic score updater. Good stuff. Check out espn’s the talented mr. roto (matthew berry) for an interesting article on how the fantasy landscape has changed with more teams using multiple running backs and teams running pass-happy offenses.

But of course..this post would not be complete without a mention of Olympic basketball – Team USA’s first game starts tomorrow against host country China. THE REDEEM TEAM!

Sportsline’s Hottest Olympians Bracket

Since apparently our female contributer isn’t around the blog as often anymore, we have the liberty to make posts about things such as Sportsline’s ingenious bracket competition – ranking the hottest Olympians. They’re down to the final 4 – Jennie Finch, Amanda Beard, Heather Mitts, and Alicia Sacramone. In the first matchup we have Finch vs. Beard, and it will be a blowout. I almost considered putting a warning on that link because the picture of Beard is that awful. I’m sure some writer got a big joke out of using that picture for this round (they mention she posed for Playboy, but pussied out by not linking the pics).

Heather Mitts, giving men a reason to watch women's soccer

Finch might end up winning the whole thing but I don’t find her all that attractive. She’s kinda thick, 170 lbs (heavier than me?!?), and reminds me of that evil stepmom in the Parent Trap. Meanwhile on the other side we have Mitts vs. Sacramone who I think are easily the two hottest. You can check out Mitts in the picture I posted to the right, or here as she plays with AJ Feeley (that’s for you eaglesforever!). But don’t forget Sacramone! The underdog in this bracket destroyed the great Candace Parker last round and if they had kept that picture of her the rest of the way, she would probably be the favorite. Last round they said “she’s attractive, she’s 5-foot-1, she’s legal and she’s flexible”, and yep, that’s pretty much all I need to know. Here’s her personal photo gallery for everyone to peruse. So all men need to do their duty and get those votes in!

UPDATE: The final round is now underway, and it’s Finch vs. Sacramone pretty much as expected. Gotta go with Alicia on this one – as I mentioned, whoever won the Mitts/Sacramone battle was the one who I thought should win.

Also, we had over 4000 hits on this post yesterday thanks to everyone searching for Sacramone. Cut her some slack, China and its 70 pound 14-year-old gymnasts would have won even if Sacramone didn’t fall twice. And to those 1000 or so hits looking for specific “pictures” of her, chill out on that a little bit… we’re a family-friendly site, you won’t find what you want.

Brett Favre Traded!!!!!!!11!?!1

"The fake retirement tears sure got you guys!"

BRETT FAVRE TO THE JETS!!!!! Now will the Jets improve to 6-10? Stay tuned to find out the next twist in this riveting saga!

Seriously, I’ll be glad when this goes away. But I actually think The Jets are a better destination for Favre than either Tampa Bay or Minnesota. The Bucs’s starting wideouts are Joey Galloway and Ike Hillard while the Vikings have Bernard Berrian and Sidney Rice. In both cases, Favre would have worse starting wideouts than the Pack’s combo of Donald Driver and Greg Jennings, and his production would definitely be handcuffed. New York’s Laveranues Coles and Jerricho Cotchery aren’t amazing by any stretch, but I could see Favre better able to use them than the other combos. Don’t forget that the Jets added Alan Faneca, Damien Woody, and Tony Richardson via free agency, and they should do a much better job of protecting the QB and opening up holes for the running game than the O-Line did last year. Fortunately for the Jets, Miami and the overrated Bills (does anybody realize they had the 30th best offense and 31st best defense last year?!?) make up 4 of the games on their schedule so maybe… just maybe… it could work out for Favre.

NFL games to be sterilized?

Put down the beer, and nobody gets hurt

If you thought NFL commissioner Roger Goodell is only cracking down on players, you’re in for a surprise: the NFL just released the new fan code of conduct. Here are things now banned from games that will result in an ejection:

• Behavior that is unruly, disruptive, or illegal.

aaaaand at the first bullet point, all Eagles fans are now banned from attending NFL games.

• Drunkenness and signs of alcohol impairment that result in irresponsible behavior.

aaaaand all fans anywhere close to 21 years old are now banned.

• Foul or abusive language or obscene gestures.

Well, now everyone is banned.

• Interference with the progress of the game, including throwing objects onto the field.

I’m pretty sure this has always resulted in an ejection, although it’s nice to have a streaking “official” for a change of pace every once in a while.

• Failing to follow instructions of stadium personnel.

This is like making a rule that says “you must follow all the other rules”.

• Verbal or physical harassment of fans from the opposing team.

With this I’m even banned from watching a game in the common room. Shiiiiit, that’s not happening.

• Fans must be completely silent at all times and clap only when someone scores.

Kidding – but at least it’s not like golf or tennis… yet.

But no need to worry: it’s safe to assume each team’s own security guys are supposed to enforce these rules. If you think they’re going to kick fans out of their own stadium and decrease the “12th man effect”, you’re crazy. I say we’re all safe… for now.

I guess life isn’t so bad for J.J.

J.J. Redick is probably one of the most hated (and accomplished) Duke basketball players of all time. Regardless of the shortcomings in his game, the guy can definitely shoot. Check out this video – the best part though is at the end.

At around 2:34, J.J. talks about being able to make “lucky shots.” So he’s basically won $5,000 straight up from Dwight Howard, and a pretty nice-sounding watch from Rashard Lewis. I’m not really sure how this makes me feel about my Magic..but this is high up there on the unintentional comedy scale. How is this stuff legal in the nba? Random gambling acts during practice and warmup games? Also great – J.J.’s impersonation of Rashard Lewis saying “lil mama”.

Hail to Art & Darrell

Congrats to lifelong Redskins Art Monk and Darrell Green for their HOF induction.

Art Monk becomes the NFL all-time leading receiver

Darrell Green introduced at his final game

Not really a whole lot to say because their careers speak for themselves, but thanks for what you’ve done for the Skins. And to show our thanks…

This is actually Canton, not to be confused with FedEx Field

…we absolutely packed Canton. 75% of tickets were sold to people in the DC area, and people say over 90% of the people there were Skins fans. That’s what I’m talkin about.

Now that’s done, let’s watch 3rd-stringers kick off the football season!