1st and 2nd. None out. Your manager? Dusty Baker. Your result? This.
Obviously, small sample size, but when you KNOW that ALL the samples show that this is stupid, youre allowed to pick out a funny one. Remember when Dusty made Adam Dunn bunt? Good times.
Even with all my vast computer knowledege (I can ping websites like you wouldn’t believe), I can’t figure out a way to embed mlb.com’s non-illegal version of the clip. Here’s a boring link.
EDIT δύο:While finding that, I stumbled across this. Let’s all revel in the insanity of a guy cathing a pop up IN FAIR TERRITORY and having to dive face first into the stands. He couldn’t even turn his back? No? Because he has absolutely no range he had to be running full speed, and because he has absolutely no brain he had to slam his head into a chair. As I’ve said here before, “If I had the range of a 10th grade jv player I could’ve made that catch with enough time to be running the other way.” Yup, I just quoted myself. Also, if your confused, “δύο” is ancient greek for “two.” You simply can’t help but learn things here at Talkpractice.
You guys heard of bleacherreport.com? Neither have I, but they get about 1.7 million more hits per month than we do (they get about 1.6 million hits per month). A guy wrote about Derek Jeter. Not much to pick apart, just annoying. Excerpts…
Derek Jeter’s been to busy trying to catch the ball with his mind that he hasn’t been trying to improve on his “3rd grade girl, only on the team because her dad’s the coach” fielding range!! Sorry I ever made fun of you Derek. Put in that light, your -121 career RAA doesn’t seem so bad.
PS: I know no one cares about this stuff other than me. Thing is, I don’t care that no one cares. Hopefully everyone can be mature and not care that I don’t care no one cares.
Also while we’re here I’m going to link this because it’s funny. NBC will probably remove it soon, but I’m too lazy to figure out how to link it from the NBC site so click it while you can.
One thing about the lipstick joke though, I feel like it could’ve used a better punchline. I think it would be better if the difference has something to do with the dog being more civil.
For example: “THe difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? The pit bull stays on command.”
or “the pit bull only growls when it’s hungry.”
Something like that. A few more examples:
“THe difference between Matt Leinart and a pit bull? A pit bull can occasionally throw a 8 yard out that has a hangtime of under 9 seconds.”
“THe difference between the Washington Redskins and a Pit Bull? A Pit Bull knows that you can’t call two timeouts in a row.”
“The difference between Heidu Turkalu and a Pit Bull? Nothing.”
Did I offend everyone? Ok good.
None of those make sense, in case you were wondering.
This message was sponsored by Palin4Prezz, supporting women basketball players for president since September 2008!
Note To Reader: I started this post quite a few days ago, certain things have changed in the world since I started it. I refuse to go back and edit stuff I wrote to make it “work” or whatever. Call it honesty. Or Laziness. No, honesty, definitely honesty…
Haven’t made a (real) post in a few days. This one might take a while. Our blog’s last two posts are me talking about this dude (who no one cares about) and a picture of this dude (who no one but finger wag cares about). Also, our last comment from a “reader” features the word “fantabolous.”
My fellow Americans, the state of the blog is “Ugh”.
I have the solution: another poorly researched list that no one cares about, but might get people to argue, but probably won’t because (as previously stated 15 words ago) no one cares.
I forgot to do anything about it, so next time I play a game of basketball (I don’t play baseball much) I vow to catch the first pass someone throws to me, run out of bounds and dive into the closest spectator, all in the honor of Derek “the winner” Jeter. Then people will say I made a great catch and they won’t care that I could’ve caught the ball normally if I had any defensive/catching skills at all. If I had the range of a 10th grade jv player I could’ve made that catch with enough time to be running the other way.
Then after that, I will flip the ball underhand (I laughed very hard at the title on that page, also I still am not sure he’s actually out, but whatever, back to this sentence…) to a teammate who will make a nice shot and people will say I was awesome because of my great flipping skills even though I may not have had to touch the ball at all, I just wanted to pick up an assist. Even if I did have to touch it, anyone who was backing up the play properly could have done it just as well, probably wouldn’t have had to come flying in, but hey, right place right time, it makes my sport IQ that much higher, that’s why I’m a winner and won 4 world series. Um, I mean that’s why I win basketball games.
This is confusing. Forget I said anything.
I wanted to put this as a tag, but it was too long so ill put it here: Derek Jeter is great at defense- except that he has no range and makes a decent amount of errors- but he has mad gold gloves and those are always handed out to the most deserving people like Rafael Palmeiro so I guess he actually IS good. Derek Jeter is baseball’s Forest Gump, he just happened to be there.
Just had to point this out. Everyone remember this for the future, although if he had walked or something, we all know Jeter ends it with a three run homer because ALL THE GUY DOES IS GET CLUTCH HITS.
I also love Joe Morgan pointing out that the Sox weren’t gonna intentionally walk Wilson Betemit because that would mean Jeter would get a chance to come up with a clutch hit.
Two things:
1. They didn’t intentionally walk him because it’s WILSON FUCKING BETEMIT
Code for: he sucks right now. Sample size: 307 at bats (decent size)
I’m sure he’s still clutch tho. I mean who would you rather have up with the game on the line: Jeter, Adam “sucky strikeouter” Dunn, or David Eckstein? Definitely Jeter. Wait, or Eckstein too. Whatever, they both have never lost any games.
Patrick Roy used to talk to his goalpost “friends” before games and NEVER step on the blue or red lines. Jason Terry wears the shorts of the next-day’s opponent before playing them – he couldn’t find a pair of Heat shorts during the 2006 Finals and we all know how that ended up. Moises Alou pees on his hands to toughen them up and improve his grip. And NASCAR drivers refuse to eat shelled peanuts.
But, a superstition revealed recently by New York Yankees first baseman Jason Giambi might be the weirdest of them all.
As if that weren’t enough, Giambi also noted that he spreads the love among his Yankee teammates.
Jeter said that he wore the thong once after an 0-for-32 slump, and he hit a homer on the first pitch. Not to fear – he wore it OVER his shorts, and hasn’t gotten that desperate since, noting that it was “so uncomfortable running around the bases.”
Damon also chipped in, saying he’s resorted to the thong about three times, which, according to Jim Rome, quantifies to about 40.
The trick for Damon?
“You’re not worrying about your hands or your balance at the plate,” Damon said. “You’re worried about the uncomfortable feeling you’re receiving.”
Personally, I think baseball needs the Yankees to be good for ratings, so anything that helps the Bronx Bombers end this stinkfest is appreciated in this neck of the woods. And the thought of a communal thong is worth a few laughs, right?
Posted by the other shammgod 
Posted by the other shammgod 
Posted by the other shammgod 
But, a superstition revealed recently by New York Yankees first baseman Jason Giambi might be the weirdest of them all.
among his Yankee teammates.
the other shammgod
capitalsports
eaglesforever
fingerwag55
socalsports31
swiznit